Spam Poem No. 3: “General Flood”

General Flood

thank god I’m back now
Important question
did you hear about this
general flood

you won’t believe this
entering the line of
populations if left

after flooding is
it, Will it work out?
conditions will be
hard as nails

A spell by ballistics
shrewd may aim some
hey girl gunfight uproarious
Ten Minutes to Your Life

if we’d had the time
Save your house
Get what you need
plays on the small

Willfully Ignorant Design

A profoundly depressing statistic from today’s New York Times:

“According to a CBS News poll last month, 51 percent of Americans reject the theory of evolution, saying that God created humans in their present form. And reflecting a longstanding sentiment, 38 percent of Americans believe that creationism should be taught instead of evolution, according to an August poll by the Pew Research Center in Washington.”

Fifty. One. Percent. And yet, a voice of reason from the least expected source:

“The Vatican has issued a stout defence of Charles Darwin, voicing strong criticism of Christian fundamentalists who reject his theory of evolution and interpret the biblical account of creation literally.” (

My head is spinning. It used to be so easy to blame the old Italian guys in silk dresses for Western fundamentalism. We’re now officially living in an age when the Vatican is more rational than Bush, who believes “both sides” should be taught in schools.

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back


Yub yub!

While Empire was even better than I remembered (and I remember it being very good indeed), it was disappointing to discover that Return of the Jedi is even worse than I remembered. What happened to all the drama and conflict? Everybody’s hugging! Technically, even Luke and Big Daddy hug at the end.

I think the DVDs are totally worth it, but then again I’m a total geek with surround sound speakers. But the attached documentary is unique in that it is willing to take the piss out of Lucas and come clean about some of the legends: Harrison Ford telling Lucas something like “George, you can write this shit but you sure can’t say it” and Lucas’ sole direction to his actors: “Faster and more intense.”

Yub yub!

Shaun of the Dead

Shaun of the Dead movie poster


For most of it, I thought for sure Shaun of the Dead was a four-starrer, but it lost its way at some point. I’m not sure exactly of the transition point, but I felt that the tone had changed too drastically by the time the characters were trapped in the pub (in other words, I had stopped laughing). Until that point, I was totally loving it, particularly a newscaster’s description of the zombies as “shambolic.” It became a bit nasty and grim (sons blowing their undead mum’s brains out), and then veered back to whimsy at the end. But all that said, it’s remarkable that despite all the humor, satire, and melodrama, it’s still an honest-to-goodness zombie movie.

Did you spot the virtually wordless cameo by Arthur De- I mean, Martin Freeman?